Author: peterb51

12th July Thursday

I haven’t cut any mortise and tenon joints for quite a long time. Now there is a good reason for this, they are usually crap. My woodwork teacher used to shout ” Butt, what the hell did you use to cut these joints? Your knob?!” So naturally I avoided this area of carpentry for a while. My dovetails were good, so good they gave me an “A” in my GCSE, but the mortise and tenon always eluded me.

So why did I decide to use them on the commissioned sofa table? Probably because I couldn’t use dovetails, and because I thought that I have come all this way in life, I should learn how to cut the perfect joint, and not the pathetic excuse I was known for.

I tried to remember which should I cut first, the mortise or the tenon? So a quick visit to YouTube set me straight, but also raised the expectations. These were examples of perfection, the sound of a sharp blade slicing through the wood fibres was so exciting, I almost forgot about the job I was supposed to do. So out came the oil stone. I remembered my woodwork teacher shouting “Butt, what did you sharpen these chisels with, your knob?!”

Marking out the mortises was simple, I learned that little knocks with the mallet is better than big swings. Slowly the floor became covered with wood chips as I patiently worked on through the day. The first tenon was ready, I had remembered to cut on the waste side, and amazing it fitted snugly and relatively square, I reduced the length of the tenon by six millimetres and the joint was complete, only another ten to go, but I think my woodwork teacher would have be pleased.

11th July 2018

A lot of my thoughts has been dominated by planning our future home. The amount of work I can do myself, and what I will have to get others to do. I dream about Roof trusses and insulation, I wake up exhausted and covered in saw dust.

I have made a start with floor plan drawings, taking measurements and even started a spreadsheet. I plan to visit some constructions close by to check how things are done here.

Kelli continues to flick through Pinterest, adding more pages of desirable images.

The business this month has not been bad since breaking away from The Tin Roof. There are two more customers coming to view, and hopefully buy some of the pieces that have been advertised. We have a bit of a backlog to work on, but I know the panic button will be pressed soon.

Another kind of panic button was pressed as I was reading my book at the Book Nook. Kelli, standing by the front window gestured to me. Reluctantly I raised myself from the comfortable sofa and walked over.

Flapping against the window glass was a dragonfly. “Can you take it outside” Kelli pleaded. “How difficult can this be?” I thought releasing the catch on the window, and sliding the frame upwards. Instead of flying out the gap I had created, the dragonfly climbed between the two frames, and therefore was now trapped. “Typical” I thought “I try to help, and probably end up killing the poor sod”

Kelli was hopping about drawing the attention of customers and putting more pressure on me to rescue the panicking insect. I tried sliding a sheet of paper between the frames trying to push its tail into the larger space, this was successful, but it would not move towards the top of the window frame, the way to freedom for the little blighter. Kelli ran off and returned with a twig. Breaking a piece off, I managed to get the insect to grip it with its legs, but it was not long enough to guide it to the top. The other piece was longer and much more successful. It was free, and gripping on to the twig for dear life. I was able to carry the dragonfly outside and placed it on a flower bed. As I stood up, I banged my head on an overhanging flower basket, causing it to swing a few feet above the exhausted insect. It would have been my luck if it had fallen and killed it.

10th July 2018

This was supposed to be a work day, it was hot, and drains the energy quickly.

I started to sand down the drawer fronts from the dresser we bought on Sunday, they were solid oak. I don’t need sandpaper these days, I have been doing so much lately, my hands are so rough (at least 120 grit) I just rub my hands over them.

Kelli finished repainted her dresser. I carefully removed some decorative trims to clean off. It is one of my pet hates to just paint over things, it loses all the sharpness. Kelli rolls her eyes when I say this, but in the end we refitted the stripped bits, and left them unpainted.

9th July 2018

Following the sale of the white wardrobe, we had to go to Hudsonville to fill the gap, and tidy the space. Kelli decided to take out a small dresser that had rooted itself to the floor. She had repainted it several times, it had grown in size and weight during the various transformations, hopefully it will sell in its latest incarnation, or she has threatened to keep it.

I bought some timber in anticipation of being asked to make a sofa table from the people who bought our coffee table last week. I haven’t had the final go-ahead yet, so fingers crossed I don’t end up with another job in progress.

8th July 2018

Kelli has been searching for a large dresser to sell to the customer who bought our last on. She managed to find one on sale but on a high price, not really what we usually pay. We planned to stop in at Goodwill on the way to Sunday lunch at the “in-laws”. Kelli said flippantly “wouldn’t it be funny if we found a dresser for twenty bucks?”

Arriving at the store, we saw a large dresser for ten dollars. Snapping it up, we drove back home extremely pleased with ourselves.

Kelli quickly messaged, and sent a picture to the lady, only to be shot down. ” I don’t really like that one” Kelli sarcastically read out the reply. Our option was still to pay a higher price for the other dresser, but that would make it more expensive to sell. “I do not want to pay that” was the reply.

Some things you win, bla, bla.

7th July 2018

After the yesterday’s frantic pace, it slowed down to a more sensible speed. I woke up to the news that we had sold the big wardrobe that we took to Hudsonville on Tuesday. Good news, that piece had been in various sites for ages, almost becoming a relic in its own lifetime.

Kelli had been the vendor of the week, therefore offering a 15% discount on all stock, I guess some people wait for these offers to squeeze out as many nickels as they can.

We also had a sale of the coffee table that I added three inches to the height that the customer requested.

Of course there was the panic of what was going to replace it, but there were a couple of new bits that I had to work on.

Kelli did the rounds of Goodwill to see if there was any new stuff since yesterday, (you have to be on your toes sometimes to get the bargains)

but she found nothing.

Every road got the once over to check that there was no free stuff lurking there, but again nothing.

In the meantime I had been working on an old desk that was found on the edge of the road a while ago. It needed a bit of attention so Dave did the repair in his work shop.

The desk was made by the Baker Furniture Company who had a factory in Holland and approximately dated from the 60’s or 70’s.

I sanded back the stained varnish to reveal a solid walnut top.

Kelli painted the frame, and it was on Facebook before the paint was dry.

6th July 2018

I still get confused which way to look on a pedestrian crossing, I have perfected the “owl” movement, in that I rotate my head as far as I can in both directions as quickly as I can. I might look a little strange, but it has kept me alive.

I spend most of my time wearing shorts, I am hoping to get some colour to them other than the Lilly-white tone I have. The only colour I have succeeded in achieving is bright red blotches from all the bites I get. My pure English blood is such an attraction to these blood sucking bastards. I have noticed the large numbers of insects that crawl, or fly about. When I work outside, I have many things attached to me at all times, and I am always patting myself down to make sure I don’t get crawlies in places I don’t want them.

The evening are often disturbed by Greer shrieking that a beetle has invaded her space, and rushes to grab the insect grabber that is the most used implement in the house.

I notice the large black ants, appropriately called Carpenter ants, that climb everywhere, I swear they move my tools about. I can only imagine the bite they would inflict would be at the “Joints”.

Ron told me of his success in the Fourth of July parade. “We won the best float, and I was interviewed on TV” I thought either the other entrants didn’t turn up, or they had less creative ideas, if that was possible. Of course I wouldn’t dare say anything, as he is a bit taller, and a bit chunkier than I am. Also I didn’t want him to have a heart attack and fall on me.

We got back to Holland, and went in search of more furniture. There are road works in the centre of town, so some of the roads are reduced to a single lane. We found ourselves in the wrong one, trying to feed in. To my surprise, people who are genuinely polite and friendly as you pass in the street, become rude and intolerant when they get behind the wheel. This old guy in a big truck refused to let us in. Kelli hit the horn, and he turned and gave us the finger. She wound down my window and thanked him sarcastically, he muttered “you’re welcome”. If there had been photon torpedoes attached to the car this guy would have been toast.

This episode started a frontal attack on anything on four wheels, and as we were both hungry, thoughtless people blocking car park entrances got both barrels from Kelli who alway has an appropriate phrase or gesture readily available. It was a relief to finally sit down at The New Holland.

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5th July 2018

They say things happen for a reason, and today was no exception. We needed to get the dresser finished so that it could go on the Facebook market place. Kelli mixed the paint, and I stained the drawer fronts. Mid afternoon it was complete, so we went off hunting for more stuff.

We stopped off at Habitat for humanity a store that sells surplus furniture and reusable building materials. This is the place we will source as much as we can for the house conversion. There were pallets of OSB selling at $120 for thirty sheets, the equivalent new would be over $500, so a place worth knowing. Kelli was like a kid in a toy shop, she found sinks, kitchen units and a pair of ten foot high glass panelled doors. I said that we will not be building a cathedral, and maybe wait until the design is finalised before spending.

Our next stop was Goodwill. Within a short time we found some amazing chairs, a total of six, although one was crudely repaired, so we grabbed four. Kelli also found some old books that she wanted to use as props for pictures. There were some classic titles, and a Spanish/English dictionary, at the time I wasn’t sure why.

On the way back we agreed to post the chairs as they were, with an option to paint them. So that is what she did.

The posting went on at 7.00pm and the first person to respond did it in SPANISH!. Kelli rushed to find the dictionary, managed to decipher it, and replied. By 7.30 pm we had a sale, and just after 8.00pm the lady and her daughter came to collect. There was a frantic rush to get them ready. Kelli discovered that one chair had a missing glide. All that was left was a sheared screw that I could not remove”Where’s the Scratch Guard?” Kelli called. I was too engrossed in trying to remove the bloody screw, and snapped ” I don’t know what a scratch guard is” and carried on trying to grip what was left of this screw. ” I need a grinder” I began jumping around like a impatient Basil Fawlty shouting “grinder! Where’s a grinder?” By now Kelli had found the Scratch Guard and was running around like a manic Manuel trying to find something to grind the broken screw down. ” Get the Dremel!, get the Dremel!,” I sounded now more like Hitler. Off she scurried into the house. The situation was getting tense because the lady was on her way, and we didn’t want to be unprepared. Kelli came back Dremel in hand. ” Plug it in, Plug it in” I demanded, I seemed to have got into the habit of repeating myself. I started to grind down the screw, sparks were flying, so things were happening. “Take the other three glides off the legs” Kelli calmly advised ” its better that way, so it doesn’t rock”. So that is what I did.

All this happened so quickly, I was still bathed in sweat when the lady arrived.

There was no problems, I loaded them into her truck, and she was gone. Kelli and I did a double “high five” as this was the fastest sale so far.

4th July 2018

Today is Independence Day, when we gave the country to the Americans and told them to get on with it. I guess many regret that now, but hey ho that’s life.

Uncommon Grounds was full of young guys in patriotic tee shirts and the essential backward baseball caps.

I was standing in line listening to the small group in front talking, and scrolling on their phones so fast, I could barely understand what they were saying. When it was their turn, the lad with the most hairiest legs I had ever seen on a teen, standing about four foot from the counter, shouted his order to the girl at the till. She kept saying ” What!” He edited his request each time she requested clarity.

Kelli had to work in the morning, hoping that we can get away before the parades start. All along the Main Street people were grabbing their places, and setting up chairs for the occasion.

Ron, the arty, furniture, I make anything and try to sell it guy, was working with a team to build a float, a precarious construction of a canopy over table and chairs, something that must have taken all of five minutes to design. They did ask me to dress up in a top hat and tails to lead the float. My reply was that there was not sufficient beer in Saugatuck to get me drunk enough to do that.

The day finished with a firework display. Kelli, myself a Greer made our way to the beach which was the best place to view the spectacle. Darkness fell, and in the clouds lightning flashed causing concern that a storm was imminent. We waited, sitting on a quilt placed on the sand for the darkness.

By 10.30pm the first rocket was launched starting the display. Twenty minutes, and many thousands of dollars later the last blast lit the sky. The boats on the lake sounded their horns in unison, marking the end of the evening festivities.

3rd July2018

I had my first correspondence with Andy since I left. He sent me pictures of the progress on the bathroom plastering, so my mind is at ease a little. There is still the shower to complete, and the sink to fit but that should be done this week.

Nicola can now start the painting, and I can lay the floor when I get back.

We had two direct sales today plus a visit to Hudsonville to swap out a cupboard for a dresser. Kelli is vendor of the week so hopefully that will help move stuff.

Both the ladies came in identical vans with large sliding doors and multiple child seats. I smiled, gave them my best Downton Abby accent, bowed and scraped, and put the money in my pocket, and they drove away happy.

Everyone is getting ready for the big day tomorrow, personally I would save the fireworks until they can get the Trumster out, that would be some party.

Recently I learnt a new skill, I managed to put new mesh into window screens. Bethanne had six screens that I was volunteered to do. They turned out reasonably good for a first-timer.

Kelli continues to look for things for the new place, THE ONE THAT HAS’NT BEEN DESIGNED YET! We did go to Lowes, a large DIY store to price up building materials, and I have been on-line to check out how to remove roofing shingles and re-use them. Boy! YouTube is going to be well used this year.