Author: peterb51

11th August 2017

Compared to yesterday, today is a doddle.

I was expecting a delivery from Amazon, so I was prepared for a long wait, even though the tracking was eminent. My plan today was to move out some of my older recording equipment, and Ryan was popping round to help me.

There is alway that dilemma about leaving the house even for a short time, that the white van man would choose that time to attempt delivery.

However I decided to risk it, and off-loaded the equipment in record time. On my return, I checked the tracking it was still “out for delivery”. Within five minutes the doorbell rang, and I took delivery of a new camcorder.

The rest of the afternoon was spent stripping down more furniture for moving.

10th August 2017

“Can you look after Ethan Thursday afternoon please?” Came a request from my eldest son Damian. How could I refuse, he is a little darling.

In the morning, with the help of my youngest son Ryan, we carried a few more boxes to the cottage for storing. 

As there were a couple of viewings of the rental in the afternoon, I was glad that I wasn’t going to be there. It was a good day, the sun was shining, and a great opportunity to drop the roof, and take a pleasant drive down to Bournemouth.

It was a good run, apart from the occasional old person dawdling along in their Nissan Micras. The barking growel of the Jag made short work of them.

Ethan hadn’t had his afternoon nap when I arrived, seeing his Granddad had given him a second wind. “Don’t worry, I take him for a stroll along the seafront, that should let him sleep”

I loaded him into his pushchair, and set off into the sun.

I began to notice that he wasn’t dropping off to sleep as I expected, instead he was getting a bit restless, and trying to wriggle out of the harness.

This is when I made the fateful decision to let him out of the chair. He had started to walk a month or so before, so for some reason I thought he would walk calmly beside me.

The moment his feet hit the pavement, he was off like a scalded cat, in every direction except the one we were going in. Realising my mistake, I rushed after him, scooping him up in my arms.

At this point his lungs exploded into a scream that would have made Hitchcock jump.

I carried this little noise generator back to his chair, and tried to sit him in it. At this stage he locked his body rigid, so I was unable the fix the harness. I was sweating like a pig, wrestling this flaying toddler, trying to bend him in the middle.

A swift punch to the tummy would have done the job, but it is not the thing to do to your grandchild, in case he remembers it, and reminds you about it for ever.

I relied on him taking a breath at some stage, which he did, and I quickly refitted the harness.

Ya! I punched the air in victory.

There was some time of grizzling, but soon all was quiet, so I continued on my walk.

On the way back, I stopped for a cup of tea, Ethan had woken by then, so I looked on the menu for something suitable for him to eat.

I decided on a gingerbread man, “How plain and simple was that?” I thought. Well this one came with chocolate buttons that quickly melted in the sun. Although most of the cake did go down the correct way, unlike the packet of crayons that was on the table when we arrived, the mess was limited, and easily cleaned with a wet wipe.

Heading back home, I had to climb a hill, which in itself was a challenge, I continued to sweat but managed to get to the top without having a heart attack. I imagined the headlines ” Pensioner lasts less than two weeks”

Modern pushchairs are a marvel of modern design, they turn in every direction except the one you want. The twenty-first century mother must have wrist muscles like an athlete. Getting through the front door required an extra hand which I did not have. Turn key, push door open, push the chair with the right hand, wheels want to go left, but can’t because of the door. Super power was required for the right hand to overcome physics. Eventually I was in, and released Ethan from his restraint.

Off he toddled, straight to a large potted plant, where he had great fun throwing the earth around the carpet. “Oh no where’s the hoover?” I called, but Ethan cannot talk yet. I desperately searched every cupboard, knowing that Ethan could be grinding the dirt deeper into the carpet. I did find it eventually, hidden behind a door??.

Pulling out the lead, I then went searching for a socket to plug into. Could I find one? Bloody no! Getting desperate, I was moving furniture around thinking this was a stunt. Soon the wall would lift and the studio audience would laugh and cheer, and my humiliation would be complete, but no, it wasn’t that simple.

I pulled a chair away and found a socket, I kissed the air, and cleaned up the mess, perfect, no one would know.

I settled down to rest, I was damp with perspiration, completely de-hydrated and glad that I survived.

Eventually Damian came back. “How was he today?” “Perfect” the word just left my lips automatically. ” You know anytime, just let me know” Ethan just looked at me, and smiled.

9th August 2017

A couple of weeks ago I had a message from Gill, a lady I did some work for. Gill is an hipnotherapist, and I used to record her various topics so she could sell CD’s to her clients.

I hadn’t heard from her in over three years, and assumed that she had given it up.

She asked if I could remaster some of her older programs, as she was starting up again.

I brought her up to date with my plans, which left a very limited window to do anything, but as my recording gear was still operational, I could do something.

I suggested that we meet up for coffee and talk through what she wanted.

Gill is a lovely lady with a soothing Scottish accent, her voice, so calming, had a real effect on me. The tracking sessions used to take a few hours to record, then I would spend a more hours to edit and mix. There were many times when I fell asleep during the mixing session.

The funniest thing that happened to her, and I can’t believed it could happen, was when she took the wrong car home. She always parked in the Tollgate pub car park, and after the session, she walked a few hundred yards to her car. She unlocked the door, started it up and drove it off towards Trowbridge. She noticed that her scarf was not on the passenger seat, which worried her. It was then she notices a few more things that she was not used to, like the colour of the upholstery .Then the penny dropped, this was not her car. In a panic, she drove back to the pub hoping that the owner hadn’t noticed it had been taken, and called the police. Fortunately she managed to get back undetected, although she did park it in a different spot, and facing a different way. She quickly found her car, and sped off as quick as she could, with her scarf on the passenger seat.

We always laughed at the thought of the owner finding their car in a different place, and smelling of woman’s perfume.

8th August 2017

Back at the cottage, I was checking out the mega shed, and discovered a small hole that was obviously made by Ratty rat. This was going to be my workshop, and I was not prepared to share it with a rodent. First I needed to check if it was active, so I placed a bag of bait next to the hole.

I fitted a heavy duty padlock to keep out even bigger rats.

I had a visit from a Kitchen/Bathroom man, to start planning the major changes. I explained what I wanted. Firstly, the structural changes required, at this point, he said that he needed to bring his builder over, so we agreed a new date.

As I am going away at the end of the month, I was wanted to finalise Details whilst I was away. I gave the man the list of products I wanted included in the kitchen, bathroom and toilet.

I discussed the style for the kitchen, so the restricted space limits the planning configurations, but should include all the appliances I need.

7th August 2017

Started the cleaning process of the rental. Never considered being a mop and bucket person, although I appreciate a clean house (yes a typical male).

I started with the shower. Wow! Viakal is a great product at removing limescale and water marks from glass. I felt like a miracle worker, spray on, drink coffee, go back and rinse off, drink more coffee, super.

However things didn’t go well. I had to be inside the shower in order to clean it. As I wiped the bottom of the glass door, my belt caught the taps, and a burst of cold water sprayed all over me, resulting in a complete change of clothes. Mmmm, not impressed at the time, but made me smile later. I did consider a more efficient way was by combining taking a shower, and cleaning it, but ruled that out, as I have enough trouble co-ordinating soap and shampoo, without adding in mild toxic liquids.

6th August 2017

What a versatile product STEM is. For the past five years I have been using it in a domestic environment, using fabrics and woods it has worked really well, giving me all the storage I needed. I spent last evening dis-assembling a few of the empty units, so I could take them to the cottage and store them in my workshop. One trip, a lot more gasping, but eventually everything was stacked neatly. Only one unit remains,which will be moved out on my last day.

I had made good progress, my head was spinning less now that some progress has been made. 

I sat drinking coffee planning out the rest of the move in my head, realising how much was left to do. I starting breaking down the jobs, and listing them day by day. I came to the conclusion that I needed a bit more help. The Jag is a great car, but useless at carrying stuff. 

5th August 2017.

My cottage is situated on a never ending slope. On the way, you stumble across the remains of Sherpas who found the journey treacherous. Everything has go up or down this path, which is  great as a training schedule, but, although if you do it everyday, you still never get used to it.

Everything fitted into the rental van, and disappeared into the ravenous jaws of the giant crusher. In a thousand years time when archaeologists are digging in the landfill they will come across these carpets and believe that   humans were covered in dog hair.

On the way back I loaded the first batch of boxes  destined to be stored in the cottage. These boxes didn’t seem that heavy at the bottom, but at the top of the slope, with the thin air, they weighed a ton. After ten boxes I thought I was going to die, and this was just the start. Over the next few weeks everything I treasured would have to climb that hill.

4th August 2017

Now it’s down to the main dirty jobs, removing the carpets and getting the old bed downstairs.

I have given myself set tasks each day so I don’t get depressed.

I had already rolled up the rugs and other assorted floor coverings, so this was removing carpets in the bedrooms. I could not remember what the original colour was, except they were grey and matted. Even a new Dyson would have said “bugger! even my digital motor wouldn’t touch this”.

So I cut, rolled, and stacked the sad carpet rolls outside, awaiting a trip to the tip.

I ended the day with everything downstairs, feeling unwashed, and a desire to be hosed down with a power washer.

3rd August 2017

Spent the morning on the phone, cancelling insurances, arranging boiler maintenance, changing utilities, experiencing a selection of different call centres including Scotland.

I felt drained.

I had a dental appointment to have my crown fitted. A simple task, compared to the preparation. “How was your appointment with the hygienist ” he grinned “Hurt like hell” I replied. “Well this bit is easy, shouldn’t take long”

True to his word I was out in ten minutes. The really painful part was paying for it. The machine quickly sucked in my card. ” Gimme, gimme, gimme” seemed to be the sound it made, as it waited for my PIN. God that hurt, five hundred notes disappeared from my account, and all I had to show for it was a lump of porcelain and a bitter taste in my mouth. As I left the building, I thought to myself, “I wondered if they had a pentioners discount?”

In the afternoon I had arranged a meeting of some former school friends from the Bath Art School. I had arranged the meet at a local coffee shop in Bradford on Avon. I was there on the dot, waiting for people I hadn’t seen for over fifty years. A text came through “Where are you?” I replied and waited for a further message.

“We are here as instructed” I  looked around at the people sitting at tables. A motley collection of  walkers and day trippers that I hoped were not the ones I was expecting. Suddenly they burst in “We were in the wrong place” They giggled.

I hadn’t seen Carol and Glenda since our school days, but all that was forgotten in an instant as we talked about our personal journeys through life. Carol was the same energetic person I remembered, whilst Glenda the more reserved.

Whilst I was at school, I was a little intimidated by the girls and tended to shy away from any contact with them, so I was interested to hear what they remember about me. 

“You were really quiet” they both said “But that was a long time ago, we were all different then”

The conversations flowed, and we were later joined by Maggie and her husband, with another Pete being the last to arrive.

We had four hours of constant talking, and the unanimous agreement to do more, and often.

Physical exhausted, I drove back to the house, to recover.

2nd August 2017

Over the past seven months I have been battling to repossess my cottage in Bradford on Avon. Dispite giving the tenant over twelve months notice, it still involved a tough legal fight. At times it got really dirty, and it took me to think of desperate measures to get back the house I own.

I understood the rights of the tenant, and followed the advice of my solicitor, somethimes feeling uneasy at his bluntness.

However, yesterday I got my house back.

I went round in the late afternoon to inspect the condition of the place. I was prepared for the worst, and I was not disappointed. 

Seeing the place, was sad. I didn’t expect to find the place cleaned, I thought I’d find a steaming “dookie’ on the step, with the key in it, but I didn’t.

There were pieces of my old furniture that the tenant didn’t want, and reminders that other people don’t value the fixtures and fittings, and not having the inclination to keep things clean.

Even as I stood in this miserable site, I had a joy, and relief that now,I can turn it into a cosy place again.

This anticipation kept me awake all night, thinking about what order to do things, thank god, I have all this time on my hands, maybe that’s what retirement is all about.

Today I bought the basics, gloves and black bin bags, the task was to start de-clagging the place.

I called a local locksmith and arranged a time for him to change the lock barrel. This gave me enough time to roll up the various rugs left behind. The carpet in the living was matted with years of dog hair, this was giving the place it’s distinct aroma.

At the end of the afternoon I was £117 lighter, but assured that the place was now secured.