Author: peterb51

5th July Friday

It was a bad night for Kelli. Although the fireworks went on till past eleven, we delayed going to be until midnight just to make sure.

But she couldn’t settle, she maybe got three or four hours, so the mood was dark.

I don’t know what to do when things get so bad, it becomes my responsibility, and blame hits me like a hammer.

Whatever I choose to do or say just inflames her condition, so I choose to give her space and submerge myself into something.

What I struggle is trying to understand the source of her sleeplessness. The supplements she’s on are supposed to ease any anxiety, but it’s more than that, there is the mental part, the head space, fight or flight, all this and more.

I am fortunate to have not suffered depression or anxiety, I should have, there have been many emotional black spots I’ve endured, but I’ve faced them, knowing what the problem was and worked it out. We wear two cloaks, I use one to shield the other, that how I deal with it, but with Kelli it’s a puzzle and some of the pieces have been misplaced.

4th July 2024;

Well I’m glad that’s over. The expectation weren’t very great from the start, Both Cameron and Greer couldn’t be with us, but Mandy, Matt’s daughter, her man and two girls came over.

Matt and wife Brenda with their little precious puppy arrived. Georgia was there, with all her issues, so the afternoon was set.

The girls went straight into the pool, that kept them occupied, not necessarily quiet.

I was in charge of the grill, filling it up with charcoal and generally the one bathed in smoke.

Matt and Brenda weren’t sure they would stay long, they were worried their pet would get tired and they would have to take it home. Oh brother! They treat it like a baby, I would be surprised if they didn’t breast feed it.

I threw on the last of the large bag of charcoal, worried that it would burn through before the cooking started.

There is a lot of preparation that goes on behind the scenes, I snooked off and started the fruit salad, when the family starts talking it’s better I go off and do other things, mainly I don’t understand what they are all talking about.

As the cooking time arrived, I realised the charcoal was a bit thin, so I reached for the emergency bag of apple wood chips. Clouds of smoke engulfed me, I started placing the sausages and burgers on the wire shelf, quickly closing the cover. Every time I had to add things I smoke hit me, with my eyes stinging I persevered, grilling everything close to perfection as I could.

The trouble was that I had to snatch bite of things in between the cooking, not having the chance to sit and enjoy my food, it pissed me off, everyone was all right, I didn’t enjoy the experience.

As soon as they were done eating, Matt and Brenda left, the rest hanging on for an hour or so longer, Kelli and I we left exhausted wondering if we will do this again.

3rd July 2024

As the holiday approaches I’ve noticed how little fireworks activity has occurred. According to the city ordinance there is a six day period when fireworks can be used, and so far there has been little disturbance. There could be a number of answers to this, one being the choice between eating and not. With prices as high as they are, there really is that choice.

I think that half America do not know what the fireworks are for. I am often asked what Independence Day means for me, I usually answer with a smile and say “We were glad to get rid of it, the journey to work was too far”.

Now my answer might be different. New colonials wanted to escape the tyranny of the British Monarchy, and winning the war of Independence signalled this new order.

So two hundred and twenty eight years later America has its own tyranny. Not a Monarchy, but a group of power crazed individuals financially supported by many special interests that have destroyed the republic.

“We the people” has been replaced by “We the elite” the rights of the individual has changed to manipulation by these shadowy characters.

Convincing the population to space themselves six feet apart from each other, wear masks, and take a vaccine, or lose your livelihood, these were part of this change.

Yes the British weren’t perfect, they have a lot to answer for, but it has existed for many hundreds of years, America has ruined what it had, and for the majority of its citizens, they have the country they deserve, the others have to put up with it.

2nd July 2024

We decided to do our shopping a day early because of the holiday, mainly to avoid the shelves being emptied by hordes, stocking their freezers, and eventually their tummies.

At Aldi the shopping carts require a twenty cent coin to release them, and there is an unwritten rule that if a cart still has it’s coin in the slot, you leave a coin for the next user. Well Kelli intercepted someone bring their cart back, and offered them the coin, but this person refused to take it, so as per the rule we left the coin on the ledge for the next customer.

We then discovered that the cart had a mind of its own. It wanted to go in the opposite direction to where you wanted to go. “This is why that person gave it to us”. Looking at the axles it appeared as if it had been dropped from a great height. My arm muscles were bulging as we made our way down the isles, I tried to avoid changing direction because it was easier to carry the cart round corners than to steer it.

So with the truck filled with food we headed home, all the time Kelli is looking for stuff by the side of the road, and by the way, we never heard from the person with the dresser left outside that we left a note for.

There were a few things that we could do in the garage, but that was interrupted by reports of a free dresser on the north side. Leaping into action we got there before the allotted time. It did have to be carried up a grassy slope that was covered with duck droppings, but thankfully we managed to avoid those.

It’s been a good month for free stuff.

We finished the child’s hutch, took it outside between showers and took pictures, although it takes as long to do as most dressers we can’t charge the same amount for it.

1st. July 2024

Days go so fast, no sooner do I awake, it’s time to sleep again. We reflect on the positive aspects of the day, but they seem so trivial.

We still try to do our arm exercises every other day, and maybe our breakfasts take too long, it’s our time to get informed about important events that could impact our future.

After the disastrous presidential debate all that is being talked about is who is running the country? It can’t be Biden, he has shown that he is incapable of speaking coherently.

The talk is about the security of this country, the enemies of the USA could be lining up to take a pop, and who will lead against that.

I could say it’s not my problem, I can’t vote, but I don’t want my ability to travel be restricted. We went through the bollocks with Covid and I don’t want it to happen again.

I want to fly back to the UK in October, Kelli is worried something might happen to put that at risk, or I might not be able to get back, I don’t want those worries

It was said the 2024 would be a year when everything changes, well we all should buy a lot of fans because a lot of shit is coming our way.

Some activity has been happening in the pond area, there has been sightings of a different frog.

This one is smaller and darker, but we don’t know what happened to our original amphibian.

I am mysteriously drawn to different parts of the garden and get great satisfaction by pulling up grass, one piece at a time. Keeping this under control is a full time job, so when I see grass or weeds growing where it shouldn’t I stop what I’m doing a pull them out, which is why other equally important doesn’t get done, I guess I’m easily distracted.

30th June 2024

There was a cleaning frenzy at the house today.

We were hosting the birthday cake party for Kelli’s mother and son. I cut all the grass and trimmed all the edges, and everything was looking good. We even borrowed a bubble making machine from a friend, and the weather was going to be kind to us.

It was the second day where we didn’t have to work in the garage, a rare treat.

There was concern that the frog hadn’t been seen for a couple of days, but Kelli caught sight of, what looked like a smaller one. We weren’t sure how that could be, but we went on with our preparations. Later I caught sight of the smaller version, it moved very quickly and disappeared into the depths of the pond, very strange.

The appointed hour came and the birthday people arrived. The bubbles were pumping out of the machine and going in all directions, it certainly was different, and I expect the neighbours were puzzled when all these coloured objects flew passed their windows.

Matt, Kelli’s brother couldn’t make it due to sickness, so his wife Brenda came along with their new Schnauzer, a puppy so small that we had larger balls of fluff under our bed. Well this little critter stole the show, even our dogs were intrigued at its size, and they didn’t try to eat it.

So the highlight of the event was the serving of the cake, however this time it was cheesecake, and because not many were able to join in, there was more for me, not bad for a bit of grass cutting.

29th June 2024

It was so humid today, as soon as I open the door to let the dogs out, I was hit by a warm cushion.

This makes it difficult to work in, without drowning in a pool of sweat.

I managed to get a lot of wood cut and glued up, but the thought of painting anything was out of the question.

There had been a heavy storm during the night, and I had expected the temperature to drop, but no such luck.

We had nowhere to go, nothing free was available, we didn’t even unload the stuff we got yesterday.

The media is still expressing shock and dismay at the performance of the eighty one year old President, they are pathetic, the poor man has been deteriorating for months, and suddenly they come to that conclusion?

We managed a float in the pool, that is so relaxing, even though movement is limited it’s still great and refreshing even for a short time.

Then there was a bike ride, the sore bums still persist, but the exercise is doing us good, I keep telling us.

28th June 2024

Yet another free dresser hunt, fortunately local.

It was left on the side of the road along with a coffee table. Now our history with those is not too good, but we took it any way.

On our way through we did see another dresser outside next to the rubbish bin. We took another look on our way back. It looked okay but would require a new top. When Kelli rang the bell, apart from sending the dog inside into a barking frenzy, there was no reply. She scribbled a note and tucked it into the porch door, telling them that we would take it away, but late into the evening there was no call.

Kelli had a difficult night, she kept waking and giving difficulty getting back to sleep.

I mentioned that we were in a good night followed by a bad night sequence. We analysed what she had to eat that could possibly be the cause. We had learned that certain foods digest at different times, usually in the early hours, which corresponds to when she wakes up.

We noted that we had beans in our dinner, these could have been the culprit, we have to monitor progress.

The frog in the pond continues to bring amusement, this morning we found him sitting between the legs of a frog statue that we place on the side of the pond with its legs in the water. So we had a frog on a frog, can’t get more poetic than that.

27th June 2024

This evening I sat though part of the Presidential Debate, two old men bickering almost incoherent. I really feel sorry for Americans because this is the choice they are given.

I learnt nothing from it, I heard nothing about how they will help the working classes.

They desperately need a third option, these old duffers couldn’t even answer the questions they were asked, it was embarrassing television.

On a more productive note, Kelli had a list of places to go to pick up things.

First stop was to pick up some cushion covers, oh yes cushion covers, how many cushion covers do we need? Apparently a few more.

Next stop was to pick up a free dresser.

There was a precise time that we had to be at the address, we got there a little early and waited.

We waited a few minutes when out of the corner of my eye a car flashed into view, almost immediately it shot into the driveway, almost causing our truck to shake.

After a short pause, and after my eyes focused I saw the signage on the side of the car, it was for a driving school!

A large black lady got out smiling, she ushered us into her house, the dresser was in the bedroom. It was a gloomy place, not much light penetrated. It was a heavy piece, and large, like so much free furniture that we’ve had recently.

We removed the drawers and as much loose stuff as possible, that made it possible to move. The first obstacle was getting into the hallway.

Standing it up on end solved that. Once that was cleared it was a lot easier, however once we were outside, the sunlight stung our eyes, and we negotiated the rest of the way by instinct.

It just about fitted in the back of the truck, the drawers were placed on top, we closed the doors and drove off to the next port of call.

There was a quilt to be collected, where from?

It was not down the road, it was not a couple of miles away, it was near Hudsonville!!

I gave Kelli a bit of stick over that, I didn’t mean it, but she is alway quiet where there are things to collect from out of town, but it was a sunny day, and we had an early start, and we would get back relatively early, so what the heck.

26th June 2024

It was a difficult night, Kelli had difficulty staying asleep, not something I have a problem with, but what effects her affects me.

After waking at four thirty, and staying awake until seven, she did grab another hour which did relieve her frustration.

We had shopping to do, and we needed our wits about us.

I managed to get some eggs down the road, so breakfast was more than a pile of dust.

All this set us back, but we managed to get some pool time in, and I did get some wood machined.

Not everyday is a landmark, some we have to take stock and take things easy.