Another Lifetime to go

1st September 2017

So this was going to be the first work day, although I had started yesterday. There needed to be a bit more repair to the other side,so I started up the cement mixer for more “Bondo”.

There are two projects that I hope to complete whilst I’m here, one is a repurposed dresser that will need divine intervention to be possible, the other is a big red bastard that used to be a entertainment centre. Now seeing this is America, their idea of an entertainment centre is the equivalent of a small cinema in the U.K.

Kelli’s plans was to convert it to a bookcase, but in my opinion the cabinet is too deep. So my plan is to cut the thing through the middle of the side, and reduce its depth to something that equates to a normal bookcase.

This is not going to be easy. I have decided tocall this cabinet “Maximilian” after the big evil robot in the 1979 film “Black Hole” it could be a bridge too far, but I like a challenge.

In the Afternoon I went down to Saugatuck. Kelli works at a used book store called “Booked for the season” a few times a week, so I went along.

I met up with Ron, who runs a workshop that makes all kinds of interesting wooden stuff. “Well hello Captain” (he has always called me that, even though he looks like Captain Birdeye)

“You’re going to be here a while, when can you start working with me?” I laughed, ” I have to perform enough miracles all ready”.

Saugatuck is my kind of place, not that it’s full of gays, but because it has interesting shops and bars on the waterfront. Even thought the season is wearing down, this weekend is probably the last big event in the town.

31st August 2017

The nature of Kelli’s business means her selling places have to be continually stocked and refreshed, and as items are sold she freaks out that she has suitable pieces ready.

One of her places is out near Hudsonville, called Painted Farmgirl, this is set out in separate spaces, each rented out to individual vendors who bring their own special eclectic mix of style and individuality.

The other space is Lakeshore Marketplace in Holland. This is laid out in settings, and is a little more refined.

August had been a busy month at the Painted Farmgirl, so the pressure was on to bring new items to satisfy the hungry customers.

First order of the day was to collect something from Lakeshore Marketplace and to take it to Hudsonville. This “balancing” between both places works well,but there is no room to be complacent.

What I wanted to do was the more complicated repairs and re-purposing to help boost Kelli’s selling opportunities.

My skills were tested on the first specimen. This was a chest of drawers, where the carcass had water damage at the bottom on the side panels. Normally I would have replaced the old plywood with new, but this time I attempted to repair the “blown” plywood with car body filler called “Bondo” 

The smell took me back to the early days at HM when the model shop had P38 delivered in bulk because we used so much of the stuff.

It took several hours to make a decent repair, and once Kelli had wielded the magic paintbrush, it looked pretty decent.

30th August 2017

This was my rest day, the sun was shining, when Kelli opened the garage door. As it rumbled open she added, “There are a few projects for you in here”

As the sun lit up what met my eyes, my immediate reaction was “Shit!” The garage was full of stuff, bits of furniture in various state dis-repair, bits of pallet wood (my favourite) and things I didn’t immediately recognise.

” And what will you actually do?” I quipped. “Well I will add the touches that will make the pieces sell”. She joked, and closed the garage door.

I had to go to the beach, it had been so long since I saw it last. The water was clear, and the boats were out on the big lake, burbling clear of the Macatawa Lake entrance before hitting the gas, and lifting dangerously against the waves before speeding into the distance.

Although I love watching the boats, I’m not someone who would want to own one. Unless I needed one to get places, they are an expensive recreational toy.

Part of the fun of the place, is that I can use my bike to get about. It is flat, and easy to navigate around.

In the evening Kelli and I went to the New Holland Brewery for some dinner. This is a ritual we have done since the place first opened. Some of the craziest stories have been shared at this place, and the beer is so good.

29th August 2017

We set off for Heathrow just after seven in Damian’s Honda Accord, he had planned to use the Bentley, but that had a flat battery. 

“Bloody typical” he cussed, “it’s a Bentley, you never get a flat with a Bentley”

Sorry son, but Bentley owners usually have a man to check on things like that.

The drive was okay, everyone starting back after the bank holiday caused a few hold-ups but nothing to panic over.

Heading for the bag-drop area in Terminal three, I discovered the now people have to print their own tags on machine asking the same questions that you have to answer when you check in on line. Out spits the tag, that you have to work out how to attach it. This is another dumbing down of the process, saving cost, I guess. You still have to wait in line to drop your bag, still have to show your passport, still have to answer a few questions, so what’s the point?

The place still buzzes with people, I love the anticipation of travelling. I’m travelling lighter that usual, no laptops, or I-pads. I’m fed up with carrying all that stuff, getting it out at every security point, this time I will buy one in the US and leave it there. As I plan to travel regularly it makes better sense for me.

I had my breakfast in my regular place, although the name of the place had changed AGAIN! but the Russian waitress’s are still there.

A fifteen minute delay popped up on my phone, I guess they have to pump up the tyres.

The security at the gate seems to be relaxed, no longer scrutinised at a desk, there is general seating with young girls walking round checking boarding cards.

Another announcement to advise of another fifteen minute delay, this is when you realise how uncomfortable the airport seating is.

Not a full flight, just the way I like it, two arm rests.

Chicago’s O’Hare airport has improved its immigration process by introducing an automatic system that confirm your details, fingerprints, and takes your picture. This “receipt” is handed to the immigration officer, and the passport is stamped. However the bottleneck now moves to the exits. Long queues build up, and you suffer the wraith if you try to cut-in. My guilt forced me to go to the back of the line, others, just pushed their way in. The bad side of me cheered when one of the queue jumpers fell over his cases, Karma strikes!

I was expecting more stringent vetting when I entered the next terminal for my connecting flight. Usually it’s shoes off, belt off, and coat off. I thought I’d see people shivering in their underwear, being frisked with rubber- gloved officials, but this time there was non of that, as long as there were no loose change, or metal objects in the pockets you were all set.

You still get through feeling mentally violated.

The last leg of the trip was uneventful, a quick hop from Chicago to Grand Rapids took less than thirty minutes, and soon I was walking down the new passage towards the re-modelled concourse, and Kelli waiting at the other end.

28th August 2017

Up at six-thirty, I started the last stage of moving out of the rental.

I wanted to be out by twelve, so worked furiously, as there is little room in the Jag, it took a few trips, but I did it. I even had time to cut the grass, although I didn’t know quite what to do with it.

Finally I loaded the car with the cases for my trip, but I still had this bag of grass cuttings.

I wanted to say my farewells to the Landlord, but he wasn’t there, but I did spot his green bin. So, that was where my grass cuttings ended up.

After leaving instruction with Ryan, I set off for my drive down to Damian’s where I was staying the night.

On route, I stopped off to see my old school friend Rob Derrick who was working on a large house in the village of Wilton.

Rob is a painter and decorator, but also designs , builds, and maintains gardens.

So it was a good opportunity to see the man at work.

The house was amazing, a converted farmhouse with enough painted woodwork to keep him going for the rest of his days.

The grounds were extensive, and the amount of grass clippings that would make, would fill fifty bins.

I reached Damian’s place at around five o clock, and immediately went to see the progress on his garage block. Boy! It was enormous, the length of five terraced houses. Only when you stand in the middle you can appreciate the scale. This will eventually house his entire car collection, with a bit of extra for some more.

The rest of the evening consisted of a Chinese take away, and the season’s finale of The Game of Thrones. 
 

27th August 2017

I took a long drive down to Whitney-on-Wye to see my friend Martin.

Martin suffers from Tourette’s Syndrome, which apart from some colourful language, and some crazy conspiracy theories,he also has some great natural skills, and a great sense of humour.

I met him at a furniture exhibition at Earls Court, back in the early nineties . He had designed some metal chairs, and was keen to demonstrate a stool made from an old spring. I tried to avoid him, by pretending to look at some interesting castors, but he was having non of it. He insisted that I try it, which I reluctantly did. It was indeed like sitting on an old spring, but I managed to mutter something encouraging, although I can’t remember what it was. I then got shown all the other examples of his work, which were very unique, and very well made.

We exchanged business cards, and a few weeks later, he called me, and invited me to visit his workshop.

I thought it would be interesting, so I drove up to Essex to see him. Cutting a very long story short, we established a friendship that has lasted over twenty years.

In those years, he has been furniture in steel and wood, built hand made clocks, that wouldn’t be out of place in a Lord of the Rings film set, and become a surrealist artist.

Martin also carries around a lot of mental baggage that is depicted in his paintings.

Often I have to help him with some issue with his I-mac. It is generally the blind leading the blind, but usually it starts simple and ends in more problem, and today was no exception.

It started with a google log-in box that kept appearing that Martin would have to keep cancelling. This was the result of some help I had given him once before. I went through some of the different passwords that I had noted. It was easier for me to be his back-up than to expect him to remember them.

Fortunately one of the passwords I had, worked, hurray for me!.

He then asked me to install Flash, which I did.

Afterwards he noticed that his home page did not appear. This to Martin was a disaster, everything he used was displayed. He started to pace the floor fretting, and muttering. This put pressure on me, as I desperately tried to find this home page. 

Eventually I found it in his favourites, so wiping my brow, I called out my success. However things were not perfect, it did not automatically appear when he hit the Safari icon. This was a big thing, and I explained he could find it by hitting the “Bookmark ” tab, and click “Favourites”. We went over it a dozen times, and because of his learning difficulties it was a hard adjustment for him to make.

I promised to find out how it could be “saved” but it was time to head home, exhausted.

26th August 2017

Day 26
I had to get the under-felt on today, no pressure then.

At least the weather was with me.

The roofing material I was using was self-adhesive, so much cleaner to use, you would think.

The manufacturer of this material is a real dumb shit, firstly you have to tear through the application instructions, which are printed on the protective paper sleeve, great idea! They did think to print the instruction several times, which means you tear through it at different places in the text. So then you have to join various parts together to get the complete version.

Then the rolls have three bands of adhesive tape holding it together. The adhesive is the strongest known to man. If you ever want to piss your kids off at Christmas time, wrap their presents with this tape, they won’t get them open till lent.

Twenty minutes later the rolls are ready to be used.

First I had to apply a bitumen primer which started the rot of trying to keep my hands clean.

As luck would have it, it took exactly two rolls, and I applied them in four different ways each with good and bad points, but hurrah, I finished it without bonding myself to the roof, or falling off and breaking something.

This was my job finished for now. Had there not been a shortage of 11mm OSB I would have completed the fitting of the outer panels, but hey- ho, that will have to wait for my return.

I went back to my sad, sorry hovel, that even a burglar would take pity on me, to contemplate what to have for dinner.

25th August 2017

I rushed around to the van rental place, and with the two hundred pounds sucked out of my account, I set about my plan for the day.

I made a trip to the cottage with more stuff, and stopped off at the Lock Inn Cafe for breakfast.

I had chosen a vegetarian option, which was enormous. If there was a sell-by date for potatoes, then that was the reason why I had so many on the plate.

The main reason I had the van was to collect my chairs from HM. It was quite a pleasant experience, everyone knew where they were, and helped me de-box them. They all fitted into the van perfectly, and I was only exposed to less than half an hour of Portal Mill.

Today was my first State Pension payment day, I could hear the faint thud, as the cheque hit the floor of my account, but every little helps.

In the evening, I joined Ryan, Louise, Amilie and Marlo at Wagamama’s in Trowbridge, for a meal to celebrate Amilie’s great exam results. 

Trowbridge has suffered from a decline in recent years, but a new cinema, and food village is an attempt to kick some life back into the place. My attempt at ordering a meal resulted in a Japanese version of soup in a basket, boy, I had to work quickly on that one.

24th August 2017

Today was turmoil Arizona. First my broadband and phone was transferred, which meant my alarm didn’t switch on as usual, meaning I over-slept. So now nothing worked, my normal life thrown into confusion. As I had packed everything, I couldn’t make any breakfast.

However I drove to my local cafe, and have a wonderful breakfast, and could catch-up on my e-mails.

I went to the cottage, with my router and phone and plugged everything in, but it didn’t work, there was no electric. I immediately rang British Gas (my supplier) to find out the problem.

It was a week or so that the supply was switched over from N power, so I wondered if there was some issue with the transfer.

They assured me everything was fine. 

The Meter in the cottage had been changed to a pre-payment unit, by the tenant, and unknown to me. I wanted both the Gas and Electric meters changed to “smart” meters, but until that could be scheduled,I would have to use the pre-payment method.

Anyway, the British Gas man said, that I would need to add at least ten pounds to the key, and then it should work okay, and I did, and it worked, ya for me.

I also had the boiler serviced, met with Gill to give her the copies of her hypnotherapy CD’s that she wanted. After listening again to her recorded sessions I feel confident that I could actually fit a gastric band, which, I thought, was a very tight belt.

I had to rent a van to collect my Eames plastic chairs that were in Portal Mill waiting for me.

There was a new methods of renting vehicles that I was unaware of, including web sites for license sharing, and code words, all seemed very complex to me. ” There is also a two hundred pounds deposit in case you decide to not return the vehicle” I did smile to myself at the thought of absconding with this little van and leaving behind my Jag, tempting? But no chance.

23rd August 2017

Back to the construction site. I was determined to complete the roof, but that meant lifting the heavy boards up to the top of the building. Luckily Ryan was on hand to give me a lift.

I was suprised how square it was considering what it was made from. It took the whole day pissing about with these sheets, which do not slide very easily. At about seven, Louise called out that food was on the table, I never hesitate when the word food is mensioned, so it was a good point to stop for the day.

Earlier I had had a site meeting at the cottage with the Kichen/Bathroom person who had brought his builder and Electician to look at the work required. The Electician was first to inhale through his teeth when he jnspected the wiring. ” All this will need replacing” he said with a look of confidence, “These old houses”. Then the builder started looking at walls and floors, rubbing his chin. ” This isn’t going to be easy, the floors are at different levels so that will have to be special” to me that means expensive.

The consensus was to remove all the ceilings, it would make the rewiring a lot easier, and they were crappy ceilings anyway.

We agreed that a structural Engineer would need to look over the ideas before they would commit to quotation.