12th February 2018
” Your ass has just broken one of my cool green birds” Kelli shouted.
The sound of splintered pottery had just faded, and it was true, my backside had just caught one of the pair of green birds as I was getting up from fixing the chair leg.
What could I say? The tiled floor offered no forgiveness, there were two large pieces, and the rest reduced to dust.
I felt that I had destroyed a Ming vase. ” I will try to repair it” I said in a feeble voice.
” I’ve had those birds for ages, they were really cool” Kelli said in a saddened tone, as you would speak of the dead”
“If they were that cool, why didn’t they sell ” I muttered quietly, or possibly just thought, I can’t remember which.
The booth was a bit dark, the original string of lights had died just after Christmas, so we drove to a local store to get some more. We found some on sale, so we bought two packs.
Whilst I was up a ladder hooking them up I managed to dislodge a shelf that had various other items on it. I acted quickly to save as many things as possible, I did not want the day to be known as “The Painted Farmgirl massacre”. I managed to stop most of the pieces falling, but I could not move, the world was in perfect balance, and I was at the centre of it. Eventually Kelli came to my rescue, and slowly the pieces were set aside. There was not much damage done, and I was able to refit the shelf, properly this time, and everything re-sited as they were.
As we then turned on the new lights, the effects were a little underwhelming. There was glow that resembled a firefly’s ass, but it was better than no firefly’s ass.
However we did bring the first furniture piece that I had a hand in. This was a small table that I made a new top for, a heavy little beast that would resist even my invading backside.
“You need some boots for this weather” Kelli announced. Of course she was right, but I had been avoiding it until I would be spending more winters here. Quick as a flash she was scouring the interweb for boots for a giant.
Up popped a listing for a pair of used ones in Zeeland. I wasn’t privileged to the details of the collection, but I left it in her capable hands.
We arrived at the address, and there on the porch were a pair of size twelves.
Kelli walked over to pick them up, hid the money under the mat, and carried the boots back. That was so trusting, and I hope we had the correct address otherwise there would be someone looking for the boots they left on the porch to dry.
Another Lifetime to go 