23rd March 2019
Took a drive to Whitney on Wye to see Martin. He had underwent shoulder surgery and has been in a lot of pain, so I though a visit would cheer him up. Unfortunately I was not in the best mood after being greeted by his enormous Newfoundlands. They are so powerful and the youngest was lovely chewing on my hand. There was no attempt to control him, and it was bloody painful. The whole thing made me angry, and Martin was getting angry at my anger. I was ready to leave, but his wife calmed him down.
It made me think about the price of friendship, and when it ends. I have know him for twenty-five years, I have followed him through his many traumas, he has been close to death so many times I am hardened to it, I not longer feel guilt at being healthy, I am not ashamed at having a job I enjoyed, and I am not embarrassed at having a successful son. All these elements always come up in our conversation, and quite honestly I’m tired of it.
He is incredibly intelligent, but at the same time totally naive, his points of view, are often controversial, and at odds with my own.
Another Lifetime to go 